Sunday, April 28, 2013


I'm addicted to mouthwash and because of that my teeth are as white as snow.  The trick is to leave the mouthwash in your mouth for a few minutes.  I usually shower while doing so. 
Plus I make sure that I floss every night. 
Now if only I could stop eating so much candy, I wouldn't have as many cavities. 

Thursday, April 18, 2013

what's keith READING?

Say I like a boy who I know I shouldn't text but really want to--what would she suggest?  "What's your gut telling you?  That's the first question I'm going to ask," she says.  "Because what you want to do usually is what you should do.  Even if the path you're going down is like a sinking ship.  If you want to be on that sinking ship, you have to follow it all the way down to the bottom of the ocean, down into the sediment of it all, until you don't want to be on it anymore."
Elle March 2013

Monday, April 15, 2013


So, I had to go to work yesturday afternoon, and when I got there I was assigned to the back booth, the first window one would come to when going through the McDonald's drive-thru.  Basically my job was to take orders and accept payment and you would never guess who drove up to my window.  It was the man that took my virginity.  He's a middle-aged guy named George (if that's his real name).  A month before my nineteenth birthday, he was the first guy to ever fully penetrate me.  When he pulled up to my window and while I gave him his order total, I thought this guy looked very familiar.  And then it hit me all of two seconds later.  It was George (if that's his real name).  I hand him back his change and then he asks if Mario was working.  I looked at him with a kind of inquisitive expression and shook my head No.  I remember thinking Noone by that name works here.  But then I thought about it and who he was really asking for was Marvin, an out and about gay co-worker. 

Luckily, George did not even seem to recognize me which is a good thing.  While he was my first, he's definitely no one special.  You see he's pretty successful--he owns an auto body shop.  The only problem is that he plays a lot of games and the only thing he's really after is sex.  And let's not even mention the fact that he's a closet case, although that's pretty understandable being as though he's originally from Africa.  I changed my phone number a good four years ago and I hoped I would never see him again.  I just used him for money or at least I tried to back when I was a freshman at Morgan State.  He never seemed to want to pay up though so I just let him go.  Good ridens.  Trust me when I say that Marvin is definitely a better fit for him.

what's on keith's MUSIC PLAYLIST?

Friday, April 12, 2013

what's keith USING?

From one of my most trusted skin care brands, RoC brings an anti-aging power duo--RoC Retinol Correxion MAX Wrinkle Resurfacing System.  Step 1 smoothes deep wrinkles while delivering a dose of retinol, while Step 2 helps remove the upper layer of dead skin without any irritation.  This system claims to erase the signs of aging and improve skin smoothness and tone among other things.  Well my take on this system is quite simple.  It is amazing.  I've noticed a slight reduction in wrinkles however that's not my main concern.  I have a problem with my uneven skin tone and this product works quite well and delivers great results.  By far this is the best night skin care regimen that I have tried on the market.  RoC never seems to let me down.  

Thursday, April 11, 2013

who's in keith's PHOTO ALBUM?


Today was another one of those days.  I had the day off of work so I woke up pretty late--I'd say around 2:00 PM.  I hit up Security Square Mall to do one of my favorite past times--shopping.  I got home around 10:00 PM and that's when the shit hit the fan.  I saw that Richard wore a pair of my new shoes.  I was so pissed.  I called him and cursed hiss ass off and he was at his usual spot--The Drinkery. 
So when you know he got home it was on, right?  Right.  It was on like popcorn.  I yelled at him and he got in my face, spitting like he usually does.  So I got in his face and spit back.  He pushed me, I pushed him and it was on like we had twelve rounds in The Garden.  I grab the fire extinguisher and try to hit him with it as he's calling the police.  He's putting on a show for the operator.  I mean the whole nine. 
When the police finally show up all of a couple minutes later, I'm in the basement trying to clean everything up.  We got the dust from the fire extinguisher everywhere including on myself.  The police come downstairs with their guns drawn asking to see my hands.  They check me for weapons and then instruct me to go upstairs.  To make a long story short, I almost went to jail this morning.  I guess the few scratches I put on him made me out to look like the suspect.  Luckily Richard decided not to press charges but he did fill out a police report so he can always go and get a warrant out for my arrest whenever he feels the need to.
I'm so tired of this shit.  Here I am thinking my life is going pretty well and once again, I'm faced with some more drama.  The only reason I put up with this is because I really don't have any other place to go.  And as far as Richard and I are concerned, we are REALLY over.  I know I've said it a hundred times by now but it's just not working.  Now that I look back on it, I really shouldn't have gone off on him for wearing my shoes but he knew better.  Richard ultimately knew that it was going to start an argument which is kind of what he wanted.  He wanted a confrontation.  You see he claims he's been plotting my exit, if you know what I mean. 
I can't believe it though.  I'm so embarrassed and once again, I'm made out to look like the bad guy.  We got the other roommates involved this time.  It's just a mess and I look so stupid.  Plus that was the first time that I've ever had a gun drawn on me.  You should have seen the two officers come down the steps like I was some kind of criminal.  What do I do?

Saturday, April 6, 2013

Wednesday, April 3, 2013

how was keith's EASTER?

My Easter Sunday was pretty whack.  I worked--nothing new.  #IHATEMYJOB  On top of that, Richard's mother, Mary Neal, died that day.  The doctor's say that her body just shut down.  I honestly don't get it being as though she was fine when she was living with us.  She had dementia, but I just can't see her deteriorating to the point of death in all of a few months.  Who knew?
Today, I was off and I decided to do some retail therapy, so I caught the bus on over to Towson Town Center and hit up my favorite store--H&M.  Unfortunately, they didn't have much.  I guess shoppers bought all the good clothes right before Easter.  But you would never guess who I saw there.  And the funny thing was that I had some kind of feeling that I would run into him today.  Teon damn near chased me down the mall.  He spotted me as I was walking past the food court and he caught up with me on the steps at H&M.  It was so good seeing him.  We did our usual playful banter for all of four minutes.  He asked me if I missed him and I said that I did.  I guess I still got it because he couldn't keep his hands off me.
After standing in the bitter cold on the bus stop for all of an hour I got home around 08:30 PM.  Richard got home a little over an hour later and he came with his friend, Christopher Roane, in tow.  And he said that Chris will be staying with us for a little while.  And you know the shit hit the fan.  How in the hell are three people going to stay in one small room.  The room is too small for Richard and I which is part of the reason we fight all the time.  Plus I'm not even supposed to be living here, so how in the world are we going to induct a third party.  Where's our privacy?  How are the other tenants going to react?  This is fucking crazy and I just don't know how I'm going to manage.  In the words of Rachel Zoe, I die and not for fashion. 

who's in keith's PHOTO ALBUM?

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