Saturday, January 29, 2011

what's keith DOING?

Okay.  I'm officially homeless.  As if I needed to make it official.  I'm sitting in a homeless shelter as I type.  So how did I end up here?  Long story.  Lucky you have all the time in the world.  (And if you're wondering "that bitch" I'm referring to is my estranged mother.  She is dead to me at the moment.  If she died today, I wouldn't attend her funeral.  And that's putting it nicely.)

A couple nights ago, I was sitting at home watching TV when that bitch called.  I figured it was her so I refused to answer.  I didn't answer her call because in my opinion she calls the house way too much as it is for no other reason but to ask me to do something.  Well, when I don't answer, she has a habit of repeatedly calling.  I'm talking five or six times in a row.  So, I eventually answer the phone and the first thing she asked me was if I used her car that day.  And I sarcastically replied, "Yes".  She then asks me why I drove her car without asking her first.  I then sharply reminded her that she requested that I go to her West Lanvale Street home and shovel the snow just a couple hours prior.  So, her dumb ass gives me that ultimate "Oh" remark which is what she says when she forgets something, gives misinformed information or when she's just caught out there.  

Okay, so we're past that.  She then proceeds to ask me to come outside and shovel snow out of the street because her car keeps getting stuck in the snow.  I then explained to her that I couldn't because my back and arms hurt from shoveling snow all day.  It was a lie but do you think her fat lazy ass was sympathetic?  Hell no.  So, I go straight outside with no coat on and ask her exactly what she wants me to do and yes, I gave her tons of attitude.  I threw a hissy fit like no other and I will admit that it was uncalled for.  But I was just so pissed off that my mother can never do anything without asking for help.  Shit, it's not like her fat ass couldn't use the exercise. 

In the heat of the war of words, we were both calling each other names.  She then tells me to pack my shit and I tell her that I'll pack her shit too.  She also tells me to leave her house and I tell her "if I'm leaving, she'll be dead".  I made that remark as I was walking back to the house to put a coat on.  Well apparently when I was in the house, that bitch called the police and they arrived shortly thereafter.

So, here's where the story gets interesting.  That bitch and the police enter the home and they call me downstairs.  I had on my Mint Julep mask and I was actually in the middle of flossing my teeth.  Talk about embarrassing, but I didn't care.  I then proceed downstairs and the terror begins.  I was questioned repeatedly while that bitch told a book of lies.  To shorten the story, I was ultimately asked to leave her home or go to jail.  She had gotten an order of protection based on the fact that I threatened her which I will admit to.  However, she has threatened me on numerous of occasions and I never once called the police on her.  

What a bitch?  I hope she rots in hell.  And if I decide to follow through with my thoughts, she'll be there a lot sooner than anticipated. 

Back to the story.  While that bitch and the police were out fulfilling an order of protection, I went straight back into the house.  And I was there up until about 05:00 PM yesterday which is when I was officially served and ordered by law not to enter that bitch's premises.  Thankfully, one of the cops was nice enough to drive me to the downtown homeless shelter. 

Who would have thought that I would have sunken this low?  Especially since I have consistently read my bible and pray daily.  Well, I guess God doesn't want me to read it because I don't have it with me.  It's kind of hard to carry one when you have to confine all of your belongings into two bags maximum, if you know what I mean.  I'm so mad right now that I could spit in the face of God.  Although, I would never have the guts to do so.  Yet, I'm sure this is the beginning of "No more Mr. Nice Guy".  This is beginning to be a bit much considering that I really am a nice person.  I don't believe that I deserve this.  Come on, I'm sleeping next to drug addicts and felons.  Well, I'm officially bitter, so fuck the world.  It feels like no one, not even God, is in my corner.

So what am I going to do?  I'm constantly thinking about it.  It's not like I have anything else to do but think, of course.  I could ask my grandmother to take me in.  She resides in Florida.  I think that would ultimately mean a new life that I really don't want.  Or I could fill out a blank check from that bitches account and burn her house down.  I've got that plan all figured out.  Or I could just kill that bitch.  I've got that plan figured out as well.  I'm weighing heavily on my first two options.  I don't have the heart to kill her even though every ounce of my body wants to.  She did try to help me out and I took her for granted.  Either way, she might as well be six feet under because she is dead to me, just like my father.  More of the story tomorrow.  (Girl, I'm tired of typing on this small ass iPhone.  I need my Dell notebook.)


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